Smoothwall Avis 466

The smoothwall ceo is act such a smoothbrain cuz i tried searching upmyself and it said innapropriate content

All this dose is be strict my teacher has told us to wach a video as part of of a unifrog thing but as it uses YouTube it gets blocked so I can't finish my work and even when im using my crome book at home thay can still monitor me if I could give it a 0 star I would

Smoothwall is not smooth. Me no likey. Aura -10000

Smooth-wall is extremely laggy and asks me to sign in every time I want to search something up. When I want to go to a website, it either doesn’t work or just takes over 5 minutes to load. Based on my experience, don’t use smooth-wall.

Just learned that smoothwall can detect and record your search terms even if you never submit the search.
If you search for something deemed high-risk, Smoothwall captures a screenshot of your screen, which is then stored and analysed. Captured data, including screenshots and text, is generally stored for up to 15 months. This has to be against some kind of law right?

Smoothwall is now compatible with unc computers, and IS EVEN WORSE THAN BEFORE. I now can barely search anything without being blocked, I searched up 'toys' and smoothwall blocked me.

Smoothwall has achieved its objective of ruining lives.

it made me cry . i was chilling on quizlet, and then dih-saster struck. my teacher announced that we had a new web filtering system to use. 5 months later, my best friend kille dhimslef.

smoothwall more like smoothballs yo

now my balls can infect yo

Its always watching. It blocks the most absurd things. It's for protecting young people from inappropriate things but it also blocks them from things categorized as 'Education'.

I sat at my desk with a scholarly mood, To search for a recipe regarding "Healthy Food." I typed in the words, hit ENTERwith glee, But the Smoothwall Red Screen was waiting for me!
I’m staring at my laptop with my jaw on the floor, I’ve never seen a digital "No" quite so hardcore. I’m home on my couch, in my own living room, But Smoothwall is here, like a harbinger of doom.
GASP! I fell back! I clutched at my chest! It blocked "Salad Recipes" as a Dangerous Quest! "Categories: HACKINGand WEAPONS OF DOOM!" (It was just a picture of a single mushroom?!)
I thought, "Okay, fine. I’ll do Math instead." I searched for "Triangles." The screen flashed RED. I shrieked in sheer terror! My eyes went wide! "GEOMETRY IS VIOLENCE!" the Smoothwall replied. "Too pointy! Too sharp! It’s a risk to the youth! We’ve blocked all the numbers to protect you from truth!"
I tried to use Google. I tried to use Bing. I tried to search "How to do a very nice thing."
I fell to my knees. I shrieked at the sun please mighty filter i just want some fun but the sun turned red with a giant red X. Blocked for: "AGGRESSIVE COSMIC REFLEX!
I’m sweating! I’m shaking! I’m pacing the floor! I tried to open a PDF on the Civil War. Smoothwall appeared like a ghost in the night, Screaming, "ACCESS DENIED! TOO MUCH BLACK AND WHITE!"
I opened a tab that was totally blank, Just to be safe, just to be frank. But Smoothwall was watching! It knew what I’d done! It blocked the blank page for "Having Too Much Fun."
I ran to the mirror to check my own face, To make sure I still existed in time and in space. But the glass turned to static! A giant red square! My reflection was gone! There was nothing in there!
Just a text box that hovered in front of my nose, That delivered the final, most lethal of blows: USER BLOCKED.Reason: Your face looks suspicious. Duration: Forever. Notes: And vicious.
My heart skipped a beat as I clutched at my chest,
Blocked for "EXCESSIVE INTERNAL UNREST!"
I’m vaporized! Ghosted! Permanently deleted!
The firewall has won! I am utterly defeated!
I’d cry you a river, I’d weep and I’d moan, But TEARS ARE RESTRICTED IN THIS TIME ZONE!
So I’m writing this review with a pencil and pad, Because it’s the only connection that I’ve ever had.

Smoothwall is honestly not bad in filtering out dodgy information, but it blocks people for "education" and chess.com

In my school I have a smoothwall outage in our iPad I got frustrated and got andry because of smoothwall

it blocks absolutly everything

Let us play fortnite

the experience of everything useful being blocked makes being molested feel like a fun theme park excursion in comparison.

Ts so ahh I would rather get beheaded than use this

It was a normal lesson.
Computers humming.
Teacher pretending we weren’t all on Wikipedia instead of doing work.

And then there was P Diddy — not the celebrity, just a local legend who earns his nickname because he once slipped on the gym floor after someone spilled a bottle of baby oil and he “diddied” down the entire hallway like a human bowling ball.

That man has never emotionally recovered.

This particular day, P Diddy had an important mission:

He wanted to Google: “Can you use baby oil to make a slide faster on sports day?”

Academic.
Inspirational.
SCIENTIFIC.

But when he pressed enter, Smoothwall struck.

ACCESS DENIED. BABY OIL DETECTED.

Something inside him snapped.

His eyes widened.
His left eyebrow twitched like it was sending Morse code.
He whispered, “It knows…”

He attempted to reason with the computer:

He typed “baby lubricant”

Then “oil for slippery clown activities”

Then “how to yeet yourself across a gym floor like a majestic penguin”

Smoothwall blocked it all.

In outrage, P Diddy stood up and slammed his baby-oil-scented hands on the keyboard.
(It smelled like a newborn disco dancer.)

He yelled:

“IF I CANNOT RESEARCH SLIPPERY ATHLETICS, HOW CAN I ACHIEVE GREATNESS?”

The room fell silent.
A single mouse (the animal, not the USB kind) crawled out from behind a computer, judged him, and left.

P Diddy wasn’t done.

He tried to hack the firewall by:

Typing with his elbows

Using Caps Lock like a battle cry

Speaking politely to the monitor in French

The computer refused.

Smoothwall stared at him like a smug digital babysitter.

Finally, defeated, he collapsed into his chair and whispered:

“Smoothwall… you have destroyed my dreams of becoming a professionally lubricated athlete.”

So to the Smoothwall developers, wherever you are, probably drinking tea and laughing at our suffering:

May every time you search something normal, like
“how to bake chicken,”
Smoothwall replies:

BLOCKED. POULTRY IS DANGEROUS.

May your Wi-Fi drop every time your Netflix buffer hits 99%.

And know this:

P Diddy will return.
With a USB stick.
And baby oil.
And a dream.

Smoothwall, your days are numbered.